Ten Commandments for a Healthy Body Image

Source: Marlene Wallach

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We all say there is so much more to being beautiful than having a perfect smile, or looking great in the newest fashions. As President of Wilhelmina Kids & Teens, I have met some of the most beautiful models and celebrities in the industry. Believe it or not, they have the same insecurities and feelings of doubt as the rest of us. Part of my job is spending time with each and every new model that is signed to the agency. One of the first things I do is to talk to them and their parents about body image. I have learned to empower girls to build a strong, healthy sense of self, steer clear of potential pitfalls while navigating the journey to maturity. Here are my tips for helping your kids feel more confident, whether it's on the stage or the soccer field!

Ten Commandments for a Healthy Body Image

Thou Shall Not Criticize Thyself: When you concentrate on what you believe are your limitations or weaknesses, you give them a lot of energy. In turn, that gives them power. Take that energy and put it toward your assets. Start by writing down one thing that you like about yourself every day.

Thou Shall Spend Less Time in Front of the Mirror: It's fine to check yourself out. (It's definitely a good idea to look in the mirror to make sure your shirt's buttoned right before you head out to school). And, if you love what you see, go ahead and keep gazing. But if staring at your reflection makes you self-conscious, quit it. You have more important things to do.

Thou Shall Not Worry About What You Can't Change: There are simply some things you can't change, like the color of your eyes or your height. So lamenting the fact that you aren't taller, or your feet are too big, is simply a waste of time. If what's bothering you is in your control--like getting in shape--then start working on your goal instead of obsessing.

Thou Shall Surround Thyself with Supportive People: If you spend time with nice people who care about you and compliment you on areas that really matter, you will definitely feel better about everything--including your body.

Thou Shall Wear Comfortable Clothes: A dress can be the hottest trend in the world, worn by celebrities on the red carpet. Still, if it makes you feel awkward, take it off. There are plenty of fun styles to try, so don't force yourself into clothes you don't like.

Thou Shall Not Weigh Thyself A Lot: If your physician says your weight is healthy for your height and age, then believe the doctor and move on. Worrying about the number on the scale is not as important as maintaining a healthy lifestyle.

Look at Others the Way You Would Like Others to Look at You: Don't be overly critical of people's appearances. That means you shouldn't make fun of people for being tall, short or wearing last season's shirt. If you judge someone by how they look on the outside, you may miss a lot of great stuff inside.

Thou Shall Not Compare Thyself: Your best friend might have beautiful grey eyes while yours are a deep shade of brown. Everyone is unique and your beauty is all your own. So size yourself up by your own set of measurements.

Respect Thy Body: Eat well, exercise and get enough sleep. If you treat your body like the precious instrument it is, it will allow you to make beautiful music throughout your life.

And remind your kids often that no matter what their shape or size, they are beautiful. A healthy self-image actually comes from accepting who you are--just the way you are!

Marlene Wallach is President of Wilhelmina Kids & Teens, Founder of JustAskMarlene, a website for tweens and teens, and the author of My Tween Lifestyle Collection, a series of books that helps parents and kids talk honestly with each other.